Extracurriculars can introduce a child to new interests, or help her develop her talents and skills. Beyond that, they provide valuable structure and routine, help with social interaction, and strengthen impulse control, says Lauren Gehman, a middle and upper school counselor at Metairie Park Country Day.
Additionally, research has shown that older kids engaged in extracurricular activities have more functional family relationships and better academic performances than those who had nothing scheduled.
While sports and enrichment activities are mostly about having fun and getting better at something, there is also a valuable lesson that comes when the going gets tough. Kids learn to stick with a commitment that can at times become boring—like playing outfield when you’d prefer shortstop—or downright hard.
“Kids learn that things won’t always be perfect,” says Lauren. “There will be moments of stress and struggle, moments when they won’t be performing as well as they’d wish. There’s so much to learn from that type of adversity. Setbacks allow the child to learn that life goes up, and down, and that hard work and persistence do pay off.”
When it stops being fun
Too much stress?
Some stress allows kids to be alert, motivated, goal-oriented, and challenged. There’s the ‘challenge zone,’ which is ideal, and the ‘shut-down zone,’ which obviously isn’t. Assess your child’s ability to manage this activity in their schedule. They may be over-sheduled, or it may not be the right fit.
Assuming a child is not overwhelmed, it’s still important to assess what activities, at what age, he’ll participate in. Parents often want to expose their younger children to a variety of sports and enrichment activities—let them try them on for size, see what they like. At some point, as their kids get older, the selection process doesn’t always go so smoothly. Parents might want their child to stick with something that their child just doesn’t like.
“Ask yourself, ‘Is this our child’s dream? What they’re interested in? Or is ours? Who’s driving the bus on this?’ That could be a real indicator of if we’re in a healthy balance as we choose activities,” says Lauren. What should be considered when deciding?
Other things to consider is how often they’ll be practicing or meeting or playing each week, and how many seasons each year. Consider what the family will be giving up. Dinners at home? Weekends at home? What is the child giving up? Summer leisure time with friends? Or free play?
Extracurriculars should be a fun,growing experience and one that enriches your child’s life. Good Luck!