How to Help Your Child Build and Maintain Healthy Relationships This School Year

As the new school year begins, children are not only returning to the classroom—they’re entering a social environment filled with tons of new faces and opportunities for new friendships. For some kids, making friends comes naturally, but for others, it can be pretty scary. As parents, you play a key role in guiding your child through the complex process of building and maintaining healthy relationships. Here are some tips from a former preschool teacher (me!) to help your kiddos start off this new school year on the right foot.

1. Know Your Child’s Style

As adults, we have our own social styles and ways of navigating new friends. Children are the same! Some are naturally outgoing and thrive in group settings, while others may be more reserved, preferring smaller, more intimate interactions. Start by understanding your child’s social preferences. Are they the type to jump right into a group, or do they need time to warm up to new people? Recognizing these traits will start you off on the right foot in terms of how to guide your child.

2. Encourage Open Communication

Communication is key in helping your child navigate new friendships. Encourage them to share their feelings about meeting new people and their experiences at school. Instead of asking if they met any new friends today or if they played with someone on the playground, try to ask open-ended questions like, “Who did you spend time with today?” or “How did you feel during recess?” These questions can provide insights into their social experiences and help you address any concerns early on.

3. Model Positive Behavior

Children learn a lot by observing the adults around them. Model positive social behaviors like kindness, active listening, and empathy. When interacting with others–whether in person or on the phone–show your child how to engage in conversations and express interest in others. These lessons will translate into their own social interactions.

4. Promote Inclusivity and Empathy

Teach your child the importance of inclusivity and empathy in friendships. Encourage them to be kind to everyone, not just their close friends, and to include others in their activities. Discuss the impact of their words and actions on others’ feelings, helping them understand the value of being a compassionate and supportive friend.

5. Teach Them How to Navigate Conflict

Friendship conflicts are inevitable, but they can be valuable learning experiences. When conflicts arise, resist the urge to intervene immediately. Instead, guide your child in finding a resolution by asking questions like, “What do you think would help solve the problem?” or “How do you think your friend is feeling?” This approach helps children develop problem-solving skills and emotional intelligence.

6. Encourage Group Activities

Extracurricular activities, like sports, clubs, or music classes, are excellent opportunities for your child to meet new friends with similar interests. Encourage them to participate in group activities where they can interact with peers in a structured and supportive environment. These activities often provide a natural setting for friendships to develop.

7. Learn How to Recognize & Address Bullying

Unfortunately, not all social interactions are positive. Teach your child to recognize the signs of bullying—whether they’re the victim or a witness to it. Encourage them to speak up about any negative experiences and assure them that you’re there to help. If necessary, work with school staff to address any serious concerns.

8. Celebrate Friendship Milestones

Finally, celebrate the friendships your child builds throughout the school year. Whether it’s arranging playdates, hosting a small get-together, or simply acknowledging the positive impact of their friends, these celebrations reinforce the value of healthy relationships.