Your baby’s all grown up. Here’s how to help your young-adult conquer their first year of freshman year. 

The day is finally here! It’s your 18-year-old’s first year of college. While college comes with a plethora of new experiences–dorm living, parties, and academic challenges––your young adult is ready to take it all on. The transition from high school to college can be overwhelming, but we’re here to walk you through it. Whether you’ve got a Tiger, Tech, or a Jaguar.

Check-in Often 

Take time out of the week to shoot them a text or even have a short, 10-minute call. Even if you have to leave them a message, let them hear your voice. When talking with your child, ask open-ended questions like “what’s your favorite part about college so far and why?” 

Texting is also a great way to keep in touch with your child. It gives them the autonomy and freedom to choose when to respond. Calling or texting them once a week is a great way to get into the habit of regular communication with your child. Consider setting aside an agreed upon time to touch base and catch up. 

Also, encourage their siblings to reach out to them during the week. Love and support by all parties will ease this transition and may have life-changing implications for the family unit.

Ask Questions

As your child’s parent, you have full authority to inquire about their life––the good, bad, and ugly. Make sure you ask questions that will prompt your student to really share about their new lifestyle. For instance you could ask:

• When are you taking time to study?
• Have you made any new friends?
• Do you enjoy living alone?
• Are you getting enough sleep?
• What are some things that are difficult for you right now?
• How can I help make things easier for you?

Just remember, while you are their parent, they still have full autonomy over themselves. It’s important not to pry or pressure them into answering certain questions. The typical traditional college student is teetering somewhere in between adolescence and adulthood. For college students, it’s a time to define themselves as adults. 

During this transition, your relationship may shift with your child a bit as they start to discover who they are. After a few months on their own, your relationship with them will likely adjust for the better and your child may start to develop a lot of respect for you as they begin to understand the amount of support you offer. 

Encourage Your Child to Use College Resources

Colleges make a huge deal of discussing student support during orientation–and for good reason! College resources are there to guide your student through every step of their college career. A student’s professor is an important resource to help students understand their workload, deadlines, and ask questions about the class or expectations. If your student is having a hard time understanding material, or struggling with the course load, always encourage them to reach out to their advisors or professors. 

Pay Attention to Red Flags

College is a huge adjustment for your child. While it takes every student a little time to adjust, pay attention if you notice these signs of a more serious issue:

• Not replying to texts or phone calls.
• Evading questions.
• Isolating.
• Depression.
• Increased anxiety.
• Mood changes.
• Sleep problems.
• Alcohol or nicotine use.
• Declining GPA.

If you notice any unusual trends or these red flags, encourage your student to seek resources or to contact their advisor.

Treat Them Like an Adult

At the end of the day, your child–no matter how old–will always be your baby. However, during this transitional time for your child, make sure you allow them to make mistakes, embrace change, and undergo a little bit of stress in order to grow and learn. While you can’t hold your child’s hand forever, with your support and guidance, they’ll be back home to visit in no time.